Thursday, May 30, 2013

The Girls

I fell like my blog is a ghost town lately. Honestly, I need to get back into it but I just can't find the time to sit down in all the craziness. If its not kid #1, it's kid #2. Then when I finally get both of them to bed its WAAAYYY past my bed time.

I cannot believe that Jayda will be 4 years old next week! Insane!! I feel too young to have a 4 year old, let alone a 7 month old too!! Its been a crazy 4 years that has changed my life, but for the better. And then Haven is just getting bigger and bigger everyday! I asked Chase the other day if he could even imagine what life would be like without Haven. Of course his smart arse comeback was, "I could imagine it. It wasn't that long ago she wasn't here." Men.

Haven is eating solids like a champ. It's so strange having a kid that lunges for my food. When I feed her solids she will down an entire jar of baby food and I have to cut her off. I dont think Jayda could finish a jar of baby food even now! Little bean.

Today Jayda was throwing her stuffed animal in the air and Haven was cracking up. It was the best to see Haven and Jayda "kinda" playing with each other. It's those moment I live for as a mommy. Sometimes I feel like I could be better. I could put my phone down more, turn the tv off, put the chores off, and just PLAY! Because in 10 years am I going to remember some stupid show I was watching (ok Duck Dynasty you are exempt from that comment) or if my house was clean? Probably not.

I was thinking the other day about how lucky I am to be a stay at home mom. Not everyone gets to do that but sometimes I feel like I take it for granted. I want to try not to just endure my days with the kids but to actually experience my days with them. Sure its hard with a baby and I feel bad I cant do as much as we used to with Jayda but I really need to take more time out for her.

I'm trying to soak up the baby stage with Haven too since we're not sure whether we will have any more kids. I think I just felt my uterus let out a huge sigh of relief. I know I've mentioned on here that we wanted them close in age if we were going to have another but then I realized if I had another kid anytime soon I'd probably have to shoot myself in the head and then that gets us no where. Props to you moms that have 4 kids in 4 years. You must be a whole different breed than Ashley D. Blake thats fo sho!

I honestly like having two kids. You go plop, plop in the car seats and off you go. Ok I guess whats another plop, right? A lot. Maybe down the road we'll have another one but we shall see..... Uterus...zip it. I still have yet to see a period come back even though Haven's been weaned for awhile. Good job lazy ovaries. Way to overwork yourself down there.

Ya know the plan when I was first pregnant with Haven was that we were going to have one right after the other (or at least not prevent). We were just going to lay off the birth control and let whatever was going to happen, happen. The only restriction was if we had another preemie, no matter how early Chase didn't want any more. So he won that battle....well there wasn't a battle really since I was/am on the same page. If it were up to him we'd for sure be done. I'm not sure what he'd be more scared of, another preemie or another girl. Its truely a toss up for him. Sadly.

For now I'm just soaking Haven all in since it could be my last time with scrumptious chubby baby legs and cheeks to kiss on. When I took Haven in for her 6 month appt Dr. Cain told us we should start sleep training her and letting her cry it out. I just cannot bring myself to do it though. Don't get me wrong, I'm a big believer in sleep training...at the right age. I guess I just enjoy co sleeping with her. The thought of having her in another room away from me just makes me sad. There's nothing better than waking up and looking at her face first thing in the morning.

So Chase and I came to a compromise... since hello, he's still sleeping on the couch. Poor guy has been on that thing for awhile now. First, when I was pregnant I had about 500 pillows spread all over the bed stuck in crevaces I didn't even know about. A walrus might as well have been laying in our bed. So he just crashed out on the couch. Although some nights I slept on the couch because of the back support and because I needed to be elevated. Oh those were the days. Nothing like a combination of heartburn,a cold, having to tape my eye shut for the night (thank you bells palsy), needing to pee every 15 min, and feeling like Haven was crowning all at the same time to get a good night's rest.

So Chase has been sleeping on the couch now because Haven still wakes up quite a bit at night to eat, because apparantly those thunder thighs need some grub to sustain life. Well she sleeps in bed with me half the night and then out with Chase in her little swing seat the other half so we both get some undisturbed sleep. I know it sounds awful that we dont sleep in the same bed but it really doesnt effect our relationship at all. In fact, it probably makes it better because we both get pretty good sleep considering...although those little teeth are coming in and there has been hell to pay. I swear I rejoiced when Jayda got all her teeth and somehow I'm back at square one. Another reason I'm just having two kids.

So this is where I sound like a crazy person. So were selling Haven's crib. Why you say? Because after 7 months I still have yet to cut the umbilical cord and just cant part. So what we're planning on doing is putting a queen bed in Haven's room. I'm going to set up shop in there with her and he's going to go back in bed. Eventually we will put the girls in the same room and get bunk beds and we'll use the spare bedroom as a guest room. I know that sounds crazy but I enjoy my cuddle time with her and gosh dang it I'm not giving it up just because she could sleep in her own bed. Plus a part of me is so scared she'd die in her crib from SIDS. My life is just so good where its at I couldn't imagine losing either one of my kiddos. And nothing comforts me more than seeing her little face right on my pillow if I ever get worried. So thats the plan for now. I know...crazy, but hey if it ever gets to be something I dont enjoy anymore then we will just sleep train her then.

For now I'm just enjoying my little Havers. She's SUCH a happy baby. She is always smiling. The other day I took the kids to walmart. I got them in the car and headed off. I turned the corner into Walmart and all of a sudden I see Haven's car seat topple to the side. I freaked out!! Apparantly, the base of the seat got unbuckled and she went toppling over. I immediately get out to place her back and I look in expecting her to be crying or freaked out...NOPE....she had a huge smile on her face even though she was upside down!! Crazy girl! And sweet Jayda was so concerned she wasn't ok she was near tears. Love my little girls!