Saturday, February 26, 2011


I figure I'm just going to get another cluster done because I don't think I am going to have much time this week.

day 19- nicknames you have and why you have them

Well I don't have really any nicknames now but when I was little I had some. My sister used to call me ashbashkadash all the time. Then I had the nickname shorty and smiley in elementary school because I was always like 2ft shorter than everyone else and I was always the smallest in my class (no wonder Jayda is so little). And smiley because I was always so happy and I had huge buck teeth so it was kinda hard to miss. :D I love when people call me Ash though because it makes it seem so much more personal. It kinda hit and miss with Ashleys though because I know some get way annoyed when you call them Ash.
day 20- someone you love
I have talked about Jayda and Chase too much and I haven't mentioned a lot about who I have ALWAYS loved and that is Jesus Christ.

day 21- a picture of something that makes you happy


Yoga- although I'm not crazy flexible I love it and it really relaxes my body and mind. I want to get better at it though.

day 22- what makes you different from everyone else

I know it sounds cheesy but because I am me. Sure people can relate to things I have been through but thats the cool thing about being an individual, you can walk the same journey and still have different experiences. Those experiences good and bad have made me who I am today.

day 23- something you crave for a lot

I know I already told you I am addicted to diet coke with lime and coconut and pretzel m&ms but I also crave sugar cookies and tomatillo dip and chips. mmmmmmm I also love uncooked tortillas from Costco. Yummy!

Day 24-Your last 5 Facebook status's

Feb 14th: I just tried out one of the 3 new work out videos by Bob Harper....Holy crap that aint no Biggest Loser workout video! That crap was HARD! I felt like I was going to throw up!

Feb 16th: I was on my hands and knees scrubbing the kitchen floor when I suddenly feel something heavy against my back and I looked back to find Jayda holding a HAMMER! I still don't know how she got it off the dresser! Sometimes you just have to laugh!

Feb 19th: Well I've packed up all of J's bottle but a couple. She has gone 3 days without it and 1 night!!! AHHH I can't wait to never see a bottle for a LONG time!

Feb 23rd: Help me make a decision because I can't! On March 26th there are two events I really want to go to. 1. To run the Biggest Loser 5k with 6 past contestents of the biggest loser (Sam, Koli, Darius, Ada, Brenden, and Adam) or 2. The March of Dimes walk... UGH why do they have to be on the same day?? GRRR I feel really guilty not going to the MOD walk though......

Feb 24th: Isn't it sick when you've been wide awake since 3am and you're not the least bit tired? I swear having a kid surely screws up your circadian rhythm! The funny thing is Jayda slept the entire night! Insomonia sucks!

Friday, February 25, 2011

30 DBC- Catch up :D

day 13- a letter to someone

Dear Jayda,

Well you'll be 2 in June. I can't believe that! You are such a little ball of energy. Sometimes you make me want to pull my hair out, but most of the time I just look at you and think "wow I can't believe how BIG you are getting and how much I freaking love you!" When you were born I dreamed of this day, when we would worry more about if you ate your veggies than worrying about whether you would make it through the day alive. I prayed for the day that I could bring you home and just love you more than any person could love another. I begged Heavenly Father to let that happen. There were days where I really didn't think it was going to happen.

I remember when you were still so small I could see every bone in your body. It would take two nurses to work the wires just right just so I could hold you against my chest. I would hardly move a muscle that whole time holding you because I was so scared the slightest move would break you. I would sing the song "Families Can Be Together Forever" to you when I held you against my chest. I can still remember those little wrinkles on your forehead when you would look up at me with eyes that just knew who I was as I sang that song to you. I was your mommy and I knew that you knew that.

I know you were born a fighter. You had to be. I know Heavenly Father prepared you for that experience. You could see it in your actions that someone was helping you. I knew it then and I know it now that there were angels there helping you, rooting you on. I remember one time as I held you in my arms like a "normal" baby I looked down at you and I asked you if Jesus was there helping you and just at that moment you gave this big smile. I'll never forget that.

Now I can't keep up with you. You are the most social *little* thing ever. You probably don't even weigh 19lbs but you carry yourself like you are a the biggest girl ever. Everyone that knows you comments on how grown up you are for your size. You just couldn't wait to get moving and it hasn't stopped since. I wouldn't have it any other way though. I just wish you wouldn't grow up so fast! I love you little girl and I can't wait to see you accomplish everything you set your heart to do.

Love Always,

day 14- a picture of you and your family

So this is my ENTIRE (well some are missing) side of my Mom's side of the family. This was from the fam reunion back in September. I have no recent ones of just Chase, J, and I. :( I need to get some done.

day 15- put your ipod on shuffle: first 10 songs that play

1. Anything- Plain White T's
2. You Too &Stuff- Brian Regan (comedian)
3. Yes I Do-Rascal Flatts
4. In the Moment- Dave Kreitzer & the Embrace
5. Breakdown- Plain White T's
6.Tonight I Wanna Cry-Keith Urban
7. A Little's Enough- Angels and Airwaves
8. Over My Head- The Fray
9. Gone- Kelly Clarkson
10.Shimmy Shimmy Quarter Turn- HelloGoodbye

day 16- another picture of yourself

Me and my sis Becky

day 17- someone you would want to switch lives with for one day and why

I thought about this hard and really I don't want to be anyone else. I like my life the way it is. But I always thought it would be cool to follow the president (really any president) for a day and see what his day was like. I think if anyone did that they would have a lot more respect for the president regardless of who that would be. OR Donald Trump so I could spend all his money...then put all the stuff in a time portal to my house. :D
day 18- plans/dreams/goals you have

Well my ultimate dream was to be a mommy. Now that I am a mommy I have another dream and that is to be a social worker. I love to help people and give advice (sometimes its probably not wanted haha). It's just in my nature I guess. I would love to work in either a Children's Hospital or in an adoption agency. I think that would be my dream job. One of my other dreams is to adopt. Chase and I have talked about it a lot and we REALLY REALLY want to! If I got the opportunity to I would be forever grateful. I am currently going through school to get my Bachelors Degree in Psychology. After that I plan to get my Masters in Social Work. I plan to accomplish all of this by the time I am done having kids!

Phew that was long! Why did I agree to do this with my crazy life? Til the next time farewell!

Monday, February 21, 2011

30 Day BC- Day 11 and 12

Day 11- another picture of you and your friends

I don't have any other pictures of my friends recently. I would put some old ones up but they are all on my other computer and I don't want to transfer any of them.

Day 12- how you found out about blogger and why you have one
I already explained that on Day 2....

Saturday, February 19, 2011

30 Day Blogging Challenge- Day 10

Day 10- songs you listen to when you are happy, sad, bored, hyped, mad

I have to admit I don't listen to music as much as I used to in high school. I have tried to play some music with Jayda and sing but then she just points at the tv and wants me to turn it on so I'm not sure how much into music she will be. :(

But in high school I would listen to dashboard confessionals, Michelle Branch, Avril Lavinge (she is now pretty yukky but her old songs were much better) when I was sad/mad. Usually that consisted of when I was going through a "break-up" because their lyrics are perfect for that.

In high school when I was hyper Amelia and I would listen to EFY songs (the upbeat ones) and we would make up stupid dances to go along with the words. We were so crazy! I also liked Taking Back Sunday.

Now I love the Goo Goo Dolls and Hello Goodbye when I am running. My favorite song by the Goo Goo Dolls is "Better Days". When Chase and I go on trips we listen to that song a lot. It reminds us both of Jayda's NICU stay.

My chill music is/was The Frey, Jack Johnson, Secondhand Serenade....that's all I can think of although I know there are a bunch more.

Friday, February 18, 2011

30 Day Blogging Challenge Day 8 & 9

Day 8- Short term goals for this month and why

1. Get Jayda off the bottle at night

2. Get everything organized for our spring break couples trip next month!!! Can't wait!!!

3. Only let Jayda watch TV when she is eating (it helps keep her distracted and occupied). She has gotten addicted to it lately and it has been worrying me. It's just so easy to plop her in front of the TV when I am trying to get things done. I know its a really bad habit though. I think we have watched Monsters INC like a million times (she loves the little girl in it).

4. Study for my test coming up next week.

Day 9- something you're proud of in the past few days

Jayda is OFF the bottle except for right before bed time! It's a freaking miracle! She is will be 2 years old in 4 months haha! Ridiculous! Since she got over being sick she just wasn't that interested in the bottle and just wants FOOD! So we decided to just let her eat and take away the bottle. We were going to try and take it away for good but she wouldn't go to sleep without a bottle. So we decided we'll let her get used to no bottle in the day time and then in about a week we will take it completely away! The girl is ALWAYS hungry now though! She is either going through a growth spurt or just consuming more because of the no bottle. Either way I am not complaining! She needs to start getting some meat on her bones! My goal is to get her to 20lbs by her 2 year appt! HAHA! Such a little bug! I love it!

Wednesday, February 16, 2011

30 Day Blogging Challenge- Day 7

Day 7- A picture of something/someone that has the biggest impact on you

Of course the first person I thought of was Jayda. She is my life and has changed it for the good. She is an inspiration to me everyday. I just look at her and think how far she has come and how NORMAL she is for what she has been through. God is Good!

Jayda a couple of weeks after birth

Jayda now eating her yummy M&Ms (mommy got her hooked of course haha)

Jayda feeding the ducks

Tuesday, February 15, 2011

30 Day Blogging Challenge Day 5 and 6

day 5- a picture of somewhere you've been to

Boston: I went there for a weekend for my brothers reception and we didn't get much time to explore since it was such a short trip. So I want to go there again just not in the hot muggy August weather.

Yellowstone: This was when I was little and I vaguely remember it and didn't truely appreciate it.

day 6- favorite super hero and why

I'm not big on superheros because I never really watched cartoons as a kid because I really wasn't into it...especially sci-fi type of cartoons. SO I'm not very familiar with them. BUT if I had to HAVE a superhero power I would probably want to be able to jump to a different location in a matter of seconds (like in the movie Jumper). I think that would be awesome. You cut the BS and hassle out of traveling plus if I were on the Amazing race I would KILL it.

Monday, February 14, 2011

Valentines Day!

So for V-day my hubby and I celebrated it on Saturday since we could get a babysitter and go out! It was so fun and much needed! When we woke up on Saturday we switched gifts...which we never do because we hate buying gifts but we decided we need to be more thoughtful so we did gifts this year. He was so thoughtful and he got me a book I really wanted called "Taking Charge of Your Fertiliy" and its pretty much a book about the Fertility Awareness Method of birth control but can also be used to get pregnant. You pretty much chart your waking BBT(basal body temperature) and your cervical fluid which can in turn tell when you are fertile. I think its awesome to be aware of what is going on inside your body and I plan to use it as birth control after we have our next baby. He also got me two shirts and a pair of jeans from Aeropostale. He is such a good hubby! I got him a one hour massage at Massage Envy and a card.

That night we went to 25 & Main for dinner and then we went and saw "Just Go With It". It was hilarious and everyone in the theatre was cracking up so hard I couldn't even hear half the jokes. :D It was nice to get out though!

Chase is such an awesome husband though. I can't believe its been 3 years already of being married but at the same time its hard to think of life without him! He is such a good daddy and I truely feel lucky with how good he is with Jayda. I don't know what I would do if I didn't get breaks when he got home from work. I literally would have a nervous breakdown but he is just so good at understanding that being a stay at home mommy can be really hard and stressful at times and that I need to get "off work" too. I feel that we are in the best place our marriage has ever been! I love him so much!!

Sunday, February 13, 2011

30 Day blogging challenge: Day 4

Day 4: A habit I wish I didn't have.

1. Coconut M&M's

2. Pretzel M&Ms

3. Diet Coke with Lime

Need I say more? :D

Saturday, February 12, 2011

30 day Blogging Challenge Day 3

Day 3-A picture of you and your friends

This is from just last month when we went up north to see the Jazz game. This is Phil and Nicole and they are a lot of fun to hang out with! Too bad we live so far from them and can't hang out as much but we'll see them sometime next month at her son Carter's one year birthday! I can't believe he is going to be a year! He's getting so big and he is a little cutie patutie!

I wish I got together a lot more with our other friends with kids (its much easier to hang out with our friends that don't have kids because they don't need babysitters :D ) but life is just CRAZY! I can't wait til next month when we go to California with some of our friends and get away for awhile!

Thursday, February 10, 2011

30 Day Blogging Challenge- Day 2

Day 2: The meaning behind the name of your blog....

Well I haven't always been into blogging. When Jayda was in the NICU everyone was telling me I needed to start blogging about updates so people could check up on her without calling me everyday. I fought it hard and instead of creating a blog I made a caringbridge page which is a lot like a blog but specifically for families with a child or even for individuals with a medical condition. The problem though with that though is that you were only able to upload a certain amount of pics and it just wasn't as good.

Some of my friends and my sister had blogs so I decided it was finally time to set up a blog. I couldn't figure out the name though for our blog. One of our most favorite couple friends ever (Blake and Jen Christensen...they are also one of the couples coming with us to Cali for spring break next month yahooo can't wait!!) were down from Salt Lake when I was setting my blog up. We were trying to figure out a blog name and Jen threw out "drawing a blake" like the common phase "drawing a blank". Which fit what we were doing because we were "drawing a blank" as to the name. So that's pretty much how that came about. :D

Wednesday, February 9, 2011

Day 1 this is my 4th post today....yes 4th! My kid is sick and I am BORED and am procrastinating my school work... back off! :D

Day 1- recent picture of you and 15 interesting facts about yourself

1. When I got married I had only been 19 for 4 months!

2. My daughter Jayda was concieved on our 1 year wedding anniversary (TMI but still pretty cool haha).

3. Ever since I was in 2nd grade I wanted to be a writer.

4. I literally am addicted to diet coke with lime and pretzel & cocunut M&M's.

5. I am obsessed with reality t.v.

6. Someday I hope to either work as a social worker in a children's hospital or work in an adoption agency. (Right now I am working on my Bachelor's in Psychology.)

7. Tying into the last one, Chase and I want 4 kids and to adopt one or more of them (depending on how my body will carry my next pregnancy). No matter how my next one goes though we want to adopt.

8. My sister and I are best friends and I called her to tell her I was pregnant before I even thought to tell Chase! I know horrible!

9. I am obsessed with learning about the Holocaust and WWII. I will watch any movie, documentary, or t.v show relating to it.

10. I am very much into politics and love getting into heating debates with people. I recently took an American Government class that completely changed my views. I am now a blue dog democrat (conservative on social issues but more liberal with fiscal issues). I never thought the "D" word would come out of my mouth.

11. If I could hang out with one famous person all day long I would hang out with either Ellen or Bob Harper from the Biggest Loser (do you like how both of them are gay? haha).

12. I ran my first half marathon this last November and ran it in 2hrs 5min 18sec! I want to run a full marathon after I have my next baby!

13. My brother's girlfriend recently got me and Chase addicted to a game called Nertz. We in turn have gotten our other friends addicted to it too!

14. I carry a water bottle with me everywhere. I also pee at least once every hour.
15. If I could recieve ANYTHING I wanted I would wish for healthy full term pregnancies. I would literally turn down a million dollars for that.  
Ok so the pic isn't that great of a close-up but I love it and think its adorable.

30 Day blogging Challenge

So one of my blogging buddies Juli is doing this and thought it was fun! Everyone that reads this try it yourself! I promise it will be FUN! :D

day 1- recent picture of you and 15 interesting facts about yourself

day 2- the meaning behind your blog name
day 3- a picture of you and your friends
day 4- a habit that you wish you didn’t have
day 5- a picture of somewhere you've been to
day 6- favorite super hero and why
day 7- a picture of someone/something that has the biggest impact on you
day 8- short term goals for this month and why
day 9- something you're proud of in the past few days
day 10- songs you listen to when you are happy, sad, bored, hyped, mad
day 11- another picture of you and your friends
day 12- how you found out about blogger and why you have one
day 13- a letter to someone
day 14- a picture of you and your family
day 15- put your ipod on shuffle: first 10 songs that play
day 16- another picture of yourself
day 17- someone you would want to switch lives with for one day and why
day 18- plans/dreams/goals you have
day 19- nicknames you have and why you have them
day 20- someone you love
day 21- a picture of something that makes you happy
day 22- what makes you different from everyone else
day 23- something you crave for a lot
day 24- your last five facebook status'
day 25- what I would find in your bag
day 26- what do you think about your friends
day 27- why are you doing this 30 day challenge
day 28- a picture of you from last year and now, how have you changed since then?
day 29- in this past month, what have you learned
day 30- your favorite song

Pnemonia+ ER=Fun Superbowl Sunday

So on Sunday we had this whole superbowl party lined up. Chase has been talking about it forever and has been eating pretty good and using the Superbowl as his "eat whatever I want day". We invited some friends and had to cancel last minute with them which I feel really bad about. Sorry Mills and Steven :(. It seems like it is going around because their baby just got over pnemonia too.

This whole month Jayda has been randomly throwing up at night and coughing a lot. She had a little runny nose but didn't act sick so it was kinda confusing. Then this last week she got pretty sick and was up all night coughing and such. So we thought well maybe she just needs to up her dosage of relflux meds. So we called into the dr and they said to up it from 3.75ml 2x a day to 10mls 2x a day. (we later found out that the dosage was wrong and it is actually double what you would give an adult :/ ).

Finally she stopped throwing up so obviously that was part of it. Then she decides that she wants to be up all night long coughing and so then we figured ok well now she really is sick. So she was really cranky when she woke up on Sat. and she had slept in til like 8:30am which is super out of character for her. Well she just was NOT feeling good and didn't want to eat/drink a whole lot. That night was horrible but Chase was so sweet and took her most of that night. That day also when I was working out I noticed that I was SUPER out of breath. So I figured I was coming down with the same thing. So I went to walmart and got some airbourne and loaded up on that. Then Chase was so sweet and took her for not only one night but like 3 nights so that I wouldn't get sick either. His immune system is like iron man he NEVER gets sick and I always get sick and then everyone is just miserable. So he was SO sweet and stayed up all night with her. He has a lot more patience than I do too with lack of sleep so he def is the man. I love that man! :D

So that Sat. night we took her to urgent care because i just had a feeling that she had pnemonia or something. One of my friend's kids just got over pnemonia so I knew it was going around. Well they couldn't hear anything when we went and said he lungs sounded fine. She gave me a prescription for singulair and said it was probably a virus mixed in with asthma and to try that (psh whatever we never even filled it).

On Sunday she was MISERABLE. That also was the day that Chase had his superbowl party planned. We went over to his parents house hoping that she would sleep there. That didn't work out so I decided to take her home while Chase stayed for his party. Well she had a horrible fever that just wouldn't go away. She was super lethargic and wouldn't eat or drink anything so I decided it was probably best that we took her to the ER to get fluids in her. I called Chase and he sounded bummed but in the end our kids are the most important things. I felt super bad.
Chase met me and Jayda at the ER. She ended up getting 4 pokes, 1 IV, 1 chest x-ray, 1 breathing treatment, 1 round of antibotics, and 1 blood draw (that they freaking didn't even end up using! GRRR!). All the while she was screaming mommmmmy mama mommmmy! I felt SO bad I had to leave the room. You'd think after all the pain I have seen her in her whole life with the NICU and several hospital stays and IV's I'd be used to it but you just don't get used to it.

Turns out she has pnemonia. They gave us some antibotics and I hope that it doesn't give her c-diff again! Poor little thing though! She has been really cranky and wanting to watch Mickey Mouse Clubhouse, Monsters INC, and handy mandy all day long. She feels so crummy but the minute I put on Mickey mouse she was just light up. I feel bad sitting her in front of the tv all day long but right now thats about all she wants to do. Poor little thing.

Also the other day she got a hold of the hospital braclet, grabbed it, went over to the trashcan, popped the top, threw the braclet in, nodded once and then walked away. Guess she's not too fond of hospital and I don't blame her. :D
Also update for me: The provera has done it's job so far and little miss Auntie Flow showed her awesome face! What a FUN weekend.....

Update on my goals...

So this is a little late but I have been super busy taking care of a pretty sick/cranky toddler. But I just wanted to update my bloggy blog with how I did last week with my goals. One of my goals was to work out at least twice a day. I went Mon-Thurs working out twice and day and then Friday and Sat. I worked out once a day because my body was screaming for a break. I was super proud of myself though because it can be tough sometimes when Jayda needs me. She is starting to really like watching me work out though its kinda funny. She will grab a 5lb weight and carry it around. Which is hilarious considering she only weighs 17lbs! What a strong little bugger! Then I took her a couple of times on a run in her jogging stroller. I wish that it was less cold though! I can't wait til it gets warmer so that I can go with her more often because she loves it! For the most part though I just did the Biggest Loser workout videos and yoga. Chase tried Px90 but I didn't like it too much. I am gonna try one other video and give it another shot. I wish I had a membership to a gym or something though so I could drop Jayda off at the daycare. But Chase is pretty good about watching her when he is home.

Then another one of my goals was to venture out and eat something new. Buy veggies I don't normally buy and such. SO I bought some eggplant and some tofu. The first dish was eggplant parm. The second was tofu stirfry. They really weren't bad. In fact, Jayda downed the eggplant parm and had some of the tofu. The tofu's texture was a bit much for me though. It was just really soggy BUT some of my "tofu veteran" friends have given me some good pointers for next time (thanks Juli and Ashley!! :D ).

This week hasn't been the best since Jayda has been sick and I felt like I was coming down with something so I have been loading up on airborne and luckily I haven't gotten sick. But the nights have been crazy and she just has been clingy to me all day long so I haven't really been able to get much done. But we all have our weak weeks...haha Better luck next week eh?

Friday, February 4, 2011

I truly feel at peace...

So for the last six months or so I have had issues with my periods being normal. For the last 4 or so months we have been "trying" to get pregnant although it's kinda impossible for me to be pregnant when I am just not ovulating. One thing I have noticed though is that when you are trying to get pregnant it seems like everyone becomes pregnant. It's kinda of funny actually. I remember when I was trying to get pregnant with Jayda (it only took 3 months) and any time I heard that someone was pregnant I would literally feel sick to my stomach. Now I think boo who. So many other women with fertility issues would love for it to only take 3 months! I just wanted a baby SO bad! But this time I actually am not jealous of other pregnant people. I truely feel at peace with everything. If anything I am just frustrated at not being "regular". I got done taking my provera on Tuesday and I haven't seen anything yet. Who knows what is going on but maybe God is just making me feel calm about the situation. I guess I have finally just put it into his hands. I think it helps that I have Jayda too because she keeps me B-U-S-Y. Plus school helps with that too. I absolutely LOVE my classes this semester.

This week has been SO emotional for me. One of our preemie moms lost her 17 month old out of no where. Her baby was due about a week after Jayda was but was born at 33 weeks. Everytime I get frustrated when Jayda is being needy or clingy Lauren just pops up into my head and then I just feel guilty. One of her facebook status's really hit me. It said "missing the noise and the mess". Everytime I get frustrated at Jayda for 'climbing on this" or "getting into that" I think of her and what she must be going through now, her only child taken so early and abruptly. It really has affected me this week. I guess it has just put everything into perspective for me. I just love my little family and am so grateful for them.